Duckie's Revenge
Duckie was livid. He had never been so mad in his whole entire life. Granted, he was only 2 years old, so he only had so much life experience to compare against, but still, this was his greatest moment of anger thus far.It was Asher, his older brother, that he was so angered by. Asher was older than Duckie by 13 months, and they often fought with each other over mundane things, but this time, Duckie was really upset.
Asher had snuck into Duckie's toy box while Duckie was napping and erased his etch-a-sketch drawing! Now, from the untrained eye, this etch-a-sketch drawing didn't look like much, but for Duckie, this was his masterpiece, and he almost exploded inside when he saw the empty gray surface of his makeshift canvas.
Duckie knew he wanted to get revenge, but he also knew if he did anything too obvious, he would be grounded from his etch-a-sketch forever (well, really a week, but a week can feel like forever to a child). He had been grounded before and he knew he could not endure such cruel punishment again. No, he would have to be fully undetected to get his revenge, and thats when he thought of taking and disposing of Asher's favorite thing: the secret pacifier.
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| Asher's secret pacifier - Photo Credit: Public Domain Pictures |
Asher was too old to use a pacifier, but he couldn't help it. He loved the comfort of having his binkie in his mouth, even if he was too old. Unfortunately, his parents did not see it the same way, and refused to let him have them. Little did they know, he had a secret pacifier stashed away for when they were out of the room, and it was his most prized possession.
That night, Duckie pretended to be asleep until he heard Asher and his parents loudly snoring. He crawled out of his bed and reached under Asher's pillow and snatched his most prized possession. From there, he crawled further, into the hallway bathroom, and chucked Asher's pacifier right into the toilet as he maniacally laughed. Revenge was his.
Author's Note
This story is based on a small saga in the Indian epic, Mahabharata. Specifically, it references the revenge the Pandavas got on Ashwatthaman. Ashwatthaman had snuck into their homes at night and killed many children and on the Pandava brothers. They wanted to get revenge, but knew if they killed him, they would be punished by the Gods. Instead, they stole his most prized possession, a jewel. The setting in this story is supposed to make you feel like a kid in a big world, similar to the show Rugrats. The characters and plot remind me of the havoc me and my brothers used to cause as children.
Hi Mason! I loved your twist on the story! I thought it made it funnier and more relatable and engaging as a reader. I grew up with a brother so I could see myself in Duckie's position and pulling something like that out of pettiness. I used to hide my brother's Gameboy and tuck it under my dresser whenever I was mad at him. Good job on a fun, short story!
ReplyDeleteMason! First off, I would like to say this is a wonderful spin-off from the mythical epic, which is something I found very refreshing when it referenced the revenge of Padavas. Of course, you must answer the questions that all of us are asking: how did Asher react to the loss of his secret pacifier? I truly think that there should be an epilogue to this marvelous thrill. Maybe Asher again would swear vengeance on Duckie for doing this. He can't tell his parents, so that's obviously out of the question. Wonderful short story.
ReplyDeleteHi Mason!
ReplyDeleteI really liked your story as it put a spin on the story and instead made it a little more humorous and relatable. One thing that might need fixing however is that the D in the title in "Duckie" is like on the other side of the page from the word it is supposed to be attached to for some reason. Maybe you accidentally hit tab while you were typing or something but it should be an easy enough fix.
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ReplyDeleteMason,
ReplyDeleteYour story was awesome. I totally did not see the twist coming and I felt that it added an interesting narrative to an old story. I feel like the more we change the old stories, like you did, it allows it to become our own. With the descriptions you provided during the story I felt like I could visualize everything that was happening in my head. Keep up the great work.
Hi Mason. I thought this story was entertaining and I really like it when people take a story and change it enough to be its own thing. This was no exception, and I thought the idea was really creative. It is the perfect story to convert into a child revenge story, and it made sense that Duckie did what he did - although his revenge skills are pretty advanced for a two year old!
ReplyDeleteHi Mason!
ReplyDeleteThis was such a fun take on such a serious story! I loved how well you encompassed the energy and thoughts of a little kid, it made it so funny to read and I really could feel Duckie's anger. I'm very curious where you got your story idea. Personally, I don't think I could've written this as well as you did. Please make a part 2 I would love to see what comes next!
Hi Mason! I love the title, it immediately caught my attention!! Your story is so funny and really proves what a great writer you are. I love that grounded = cruel punishment, haha. I am happy Duckie, the two-year-old, got his revenge! I think you're writing style is super creative and I would also love to see a part two of this story!!
ReplyDelete